I've been in public settings, like addressing a courtroom or presenting before a classroom, in which I was the focal point of the audience. I've even been in foreign countries where people took more notice of me because of the color of my skin. Regardless of these experiences, it wasn't until I reached India that I came to know what it is like to be stared at.
In the good old USA, if an attractive girl catches a guy's eye, he may stare at her, but as soon as she catches him, he reacts- whether he sheepishly looks away or boldly catcalls... he must react. On the other hand, India is the only place I have ever been where the intensity and duration of the stare in no way depend on whether the object of the stare is aware of it. In other words, the stare doesn't change or diminish when I catch the person staring at me. I can dance, make funny faces, or speak gibberish- yet the stare continues and actually intensifies. An English friend of mine responds by staring back with equal enthusiasm, pointing two fingers at his eyes, pointing directly at the starer, and then shaking his head no... but still, the starer is not phased. We have to accept that the stare is a part of life here, even if nothing about it is casual. It is a goggle-eyed, jaw-dropping fascination with the fact that I live and breath and move. No one speaks when they stare either. In traffic, the perpetual horn-honking doesn't distract the guy on the motorcycle beside you or the girl in the rickshaw on the other side from craning their necks inside your rickshaw to gaze at you sitting and sweating, and, rest assured, they will not withdraw until the traffic clears ahead.
If the staring occurs long enough and in close enough proximity, the more adventurous gazers will often squeeze out a quick question, “From which country?” While responses to countries including Brazil and Zimbabwe have met with delightful success, my usual response is America. Further, when I say the US, I get the same two replies: (1) Ohhh, America- Home of the Brave and Land of the Freeeeee!!! (2) Ohhh, America, OBAMAAAAA!!!
The staring is one thing, but many people often take it to another level. I can't count the number of times people have requested a photo with me on their cell phone. Further, it is not just giggling teenage girls, but full grown men with families that ask for these pictures. It can get exhausting because as soon as you allow one, everyone around realizes you're a pushover and they also ask for pictures. My roommate had a whole platoon of army guys surround him for snaps (pictures) in Rajasthan. I have no idea where these pictures go or what purpose they serve, but they sure love'em here.
The ironic/hypocritical element of this blog is that I return my fare share of staring. There is just so much to see here. The colors are dazzling. Every evening the streets fill with people. The markets hold more fruits and vegetables that I can't identify than those that I can. Additionally, rows of canvas sacks overflowing with every kind of spice imaginable supplement the marketplace with dots of color, complementing the bundles of intense color made by the produce. Nevertheless, the brightest banana, mango, or orange doesn't hold a candle to the women's clothing. Women wear sari's here, long pieces of fabric that are wrapped around a woman and pinned in place- and none of them are bland. Vibrant colors all the way across the spectrum are embroidered with gold prints and patterns. Its just something you have to see to believe. The amazing thing is that none of these come off flashy, as they fit perfectly the wild eyes and the bright smiles of Indian women. They are unconditionally elegant, and I can't help but think that my Granny would absolutely love the way the women here dress. The colors don't end with the spices, food, and dress, but festivals frequently pop-up and add colors and lights to the dim neighbors. Fireworks go off every night. I am not exaggerating. In fact, about every three days I am awakened in the middle of night to a tremendous boom and explosion of color bursting through my open window. Needless to say, I don't enjoy these as much.
All in all, these things fit with what I am discovering-- that this country is a country of extremes.
May 17, 2009
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Wow, I would love to see this culture in person! The colors and fireworks... wow.
The Guizhou province of China is another place where people unabashedly stare. They take pictures and point and yell "foreigner" in Mandarin. On the plane from Guiyang to Beijing, one lady even stood behind my friend playing with our hair and talking excitedly to her friend. I guess because it was curly. Anyway, I can definitely identify! ha ha
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